I got told

l've always felt like I was an old soul, like I've been here before. There were certain qualities I associated with being this way. I assumed that because I was a worrier and lived my life guarded by fear meant that I've experienced this scary world and its threatening people more than once. I thought I had an understanding of the world far beyond my years and I called it wisdom. 

Keane is the opposite of me in many ways. He is laid back and go-with-the-flow. Not much bothers him. He was one of the souls I considered to be "new" because clearly he hadn't yet been jaded by pain. I thought I had it all figured out until the other night when the topic came up and Keane's question got me thinking.

"How do you know I'm not the old soul and you're the new soul?" he asked.


Now how on earth would he figure that?

"Maybe an old soul is one that has figured out how to let things go, be unaffected by the world and free of stress? And a new soul still needs time to perfect these things?"

::crickets::

My first response was defensiveness because, hello? It called into question my expert evaluation of self. I am nothing if not introspective.

But once I was able to get past my ego, I wondered when this husband of mine became such a wise old bird? Because life is ultimately about softening our hearts to others and the world around us. A hard exterior doesn't necessarily imply wisdom or experience– it's simply a defensive mechanism. Real wisdom comes when we learn to remain unaffected by circumstance and centered within.

I realized my mister may be onto something with this. Maybe a new soul is one who is suspicious of people, fearful of the world and a worrier to the depths? And maybe an old soul has mastered the art of living freely? Maybe they are the ones sent back to help the newbies "let go."

I always assumed opposite personalities were artfully paired together for the purpose of teaching one another things they needed to learn.

It's just that I'm realizing I have more to learn than I once thought.

and so it is...