Feb 9, 2012

It's a decision

On our 4 hour journey home from Colorado last weekend, Keane and I had one of our "meaning of life" discussions. These typically take place about once a month and nothing is off limits: religion, relationships, money, sex, family, kids, and health.

If it's possible for two individuals to over-communicate, I think we might be guilty of it. 
Must be engrained in me from all my years in therapy ;)

I'd like to share the end of our conversation which went something like this:

Him: "Do you think we are just really lucky?" 
Me: "What do you mean?"
Him: "Well, a year and a half ago, I was miserable in my position at work and they transfer me to the district office. A few months after that, when I was desperate for a break from the traffic and smog of city life, they offer to move me to Wyoming for a year, pay me double my salary, and promote me before anyone else my age."
Me: "Uh huh."
Him: "Then, in September, we unexpectedly move to Casper where your dream job basically falls into your lap. You had no experience, just a passion for writing, and you were offered the job within days of applying."

I chucked and nodded. 

Him: "These past several months, we've been able to travel the country, see things we never would have otherwise, pay off all our student loans, and save for a house. Do you think it's all dumb luck or something more?"

I thought for a few moments before answering.

Me: "Here's what I think. There's no such thing as luck. We are not lucky. We are very very blessed. We've said 'yes' more times than we've said 'no' to things that seemed scary. We work hard. And we have always tried to look for the good in every situation, even if it's been difficult."


I believe things play out the way they are designed to and we don't always have a say in the matter. It's called Divine Order and it certainly, doesn't explain why people get cancer, loved ones die tragic deaths, or babies are born into war stricken countries. But I don't look to it for an explanation of pain. We were never promised this life would be painless, but we were given free will which allows us to choose how we react to challenges.

To me, faith in that is good enough. 

Please, don't mistake this for naiveté. I can assure you my head isn't fixed among the clouds. What Keane didn't mention in his running list of graces and answered prayers, were the equal number of storms we've had to walk through over the last few years. The painful divorces of parents, dark and confusing family struggles, and unspeakable physical challenges – all of which are real issues that we've been forced to face and deal with. I don't intend to imply that life is always rosy. Bad things happen to good people. Good things happen to bad people. And there will never be an explanation for why we are put on this earth to face heartache. Things don't always make sense or seem fair.

But what I found to be most beautiful from Keane's comments, weren't the mention of all the blessings in our lives. It was his omission of our hardships. He could have easily said, "Life would be really good if we could just figure out how to get rid of your neurological pain" or, "Things were a lot easier in my family 3 years ago." But he didn't because life is good now if we allow it to be. 

Each day, we make an effort to find the beauty that's around us. Not because we pretend bad things don't exist, but because we choose to focus on abundance rather than lack.

It isn't luck. It's a decision.


and so it is...

No comments:

Post a Comment

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...